Tiptoe through the Taper – A Novelty Song by ‘Big Ben’ Bernanke

Several Fed presidents, and “Big Ben” Bernanke himself, have been spending the last week or so trying to convince markets that their program of quantitative easing isn’t on the immediate chopping block and that any eventual tapering would be contingent on continued economic improvement. They’ve tried speeches, press conferences…maybe it’s time for a novelty song, sung to soothe markets back toward normality?

“Tiptoe through the Taper”

 by ‘Big Ben’ Bernanke

 – Sung to the tune of “Tiptoe through the Tulips” by Tiny Tim, accompanied by ukulele


Panic, after the meeting,

After the meeting of the F-O-M-C

Come tiptoe through the taper with me.


Easing won’t be seizing

Misunderstanding sparked uncertainty

Come tiptoe through the taper with me.


Be-hold! It is our intent

To hold…fed funds at point-two-five percent

And if I stick to both our benchmarks: max employment,

and price stability.

Will you tiptoe through the taper with me?


You can read more about our thoughts on the taper, as well as insights on China and Japan in the latest Economic Insights; I’ll post a link when it’s available!


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